“He will see the caller-id and won’t pick up”, Su said.
Undaunted I pressed the call button. The rings started after a seconds pause. At the second ring Su said , like an expert in psychology, “Wanna bet?”.
The rings continued. Third. Fourth. Fifth. Sixth. Su’s eyes twinkled with a “I told ya” yet Hope framed that black cloud of smug knowledge, like a silver lining.
The rings continued. Seventh. Eighth. My heart, an expert diver, was getting ready for the plunge.
The ringing stopped. A second later we heard a “Hello”.. that voice turns me into a poet:
“You are the Moon that never wanes
On my darkest nights”
—————- end ————–
This true ‘story’ happened two days ago when my husband, younger son and me sat in the backyard star-gazing (my husband was pixel gazing). I said that I was going to call my older son at a summer camp 200 miles away. My little one is the “Su” in the story…the Mr. Know-it-all …who secretly misses his brother more than us.
The owner of the “Hello” is my oldest son, who is learning the art of ignoring his parents at summer school and getting quite adept at not returning our calls or texts.
Pleased after speaking to our heart’s content, we continued to star-gaze and found to our amazement that the ‘not twinkling star’ was Saturn. Googling confirmed that in August 2015 Saturn is the most visible planet on the night sky , without a telescope. With a medium telescope the site said that we could see Saturn’s rings. But we had enough ‘rings’ for that night so we continued to watch it with our naked eye ..marvelling on how we couldn’t see the neighbouring town that was 5 miles away, yet see Saturn that was around 1.2 billion kilometres away.
———————–
This 109 word story is written in response to the 100 word photo challenge posted by Rochelle Wisoff-Field each week. PHOTO PROMPT Madison Woods.
Click on the ‘blue frog’ below to read other amazing takes, that fellow Friday Fictioneers have, on the same photo prompt:
I think you’re getting through.
Good piece.
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Thanks Mick.
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Delightful. 🙂
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Thanks Sandra.
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Works very well without the background.
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Thanks!
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Oh, that’s a nice story! I was initially thinking it was from a romantic perspective. I can tell you I turn into anything but a poet under circumstances of that nature. I tend to forget how to talk! But with filial love, one is more at ease, I think.
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Thanks Illsa. I added the personal narrative to show that this was not the “romantic” variety.
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Lovely story. Nicely crafted too!
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Thank you!
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Lovely personal piece!
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Thanks Parul.
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Cute story! I loved it!
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Thanks PJ!
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Lovely story, especially when reading your explanation.
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Thanks!
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A lovely way to tell a true story.
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Thanks Sally.
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Wonderful. As a standalone, it is beautifully romantic. With your explanation, it is great fun.
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Thanks. I realized that it could be interpreted as romantic so I added the personal narrative that other types of love can be fun too 🙂
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I loved the analogy of the heart, an expert diver, getting ready for the plunge.
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Thank you! That analogy came out of my mind in a flash….making me wish for more such flashes 🙂
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Writ(h)ing with envy over the “heart, an expert diver” line- just gorgeous; but I was thrown by the snark of the “expert psychologist.” Thanks for the story behind the story. It helps to know the speaker is a youth.
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Thanks Kimberly. They say the bestest form of compliment is showing envy! Sometimes inspiration strikes like lightning and is not re-created easily – writing that line was one such moment.
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I thought it was a romantic story, at first, but I also like the background story you supplied. Very nicely done!
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Thank you Dreamer!
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Last week I was complaining that my oldest son never answered my calls or bothered to call to find out why I’d called in the first place. I always ask his brother to let him know I need to talk to him. Today, I’m complaining because he’s moved back in and I want my privacy back. You can’t win, honest, it’s a losing battle. 🙂
Love your story though! Beautifully told!
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Thanks Yolanda! Your story is consistent with what I hear from most parents. Hope you find that winning middle ground soon. 🙂
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That’s sweet that the little brother misses his brother and that the oldest is trying to be so cool and be Mr. Tough One. I have a similar dynamic with my two boys. Great that you could see the rings. Just wow! I wish I had seen it. Lovely story!
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Thanks Amy. It’s fun to watch them showing their love for each other now and then..usually we get to watch the sibling rivalry and that gets stale too soon.
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Boys have their own ways to depict courage… even if they miss their people they hesitate to show… I guess it’s part of growing up!
Cheers for the lovely story.
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Thanks Ira. Somehow not showing feeling has come to be considered as “manly” and courageous. When in fact it takes a lot of courage to show what one feels.
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Connie and I often make similar statements when calling our grown children. Will they answer, will they call back? However, if we’re with them and someone else calls, they pick up on the first ring. Funny how that happens.
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I think it’s got to do with us always being there for them since they were born…we are easily taken for granted. It’s an interesting feeling though to see the child that once clung us and won’t go to strangers now prefers strangers( i mean friends) 🙂
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Dear Ansumani,
I loved “my heart, an expert diver.” Nicely done and sweetly written. I have three sons who live in three different parts of the States. We don’t speak often enough.
Shalom,
Rochelle
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Dear Rochelle, Hope you have recovered from your oral surgery. Thanks for your kind words.
It’s a good thing that you have a ton of “characters” to speak to 🙂
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How I wish all true stories are as sweet and heart-warming as this 🙂
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We can wish and create a sweet story within the universe that’s in our control…however small that universe is 🙂
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True 🙂
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A beautiful story that works on so many levels. It is obviously striking a resonating chord with lots of people. I’ll add my name to that list – even though I’ve got daughters, not sons.
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Thanks Margaret. Looks like this is an universal situation with parents across the world 🙂
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Lovely piece of whimsy here. I leave with warmth in my chest.
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Thanks Patrick!
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