No loitering allowed here…

Ruins - © 2015, Barbara W. Beacham

Finish the story begins with: 

Where did they go? Those good old days?“, Sara sighed. She  remembers them blazing a path through the weeds to the ruins:  their playground, their castle, their love nest. Flirting as the butterflies flitted around the fallen bricks ….

Each brick invokes a memory – each memory , a brick…

A day is a day – it’s neither Old nor young. It could be called ‘good young days’ Especially, if you are referring to a day  when we were young ” ,  He pauses his unnecessary non sequitur.

Sara’s silence encourages him to continue, “Those days just don’t become ‘good‘ because it wasn’t ‘bad‘.  It was actually quite boring at times. Loitering aimlessly in those ruins because there was nothing better to do wasn’t exactly one would call ‘good‘ “

The words of her childhood friend turned lover, turned husband, turned philosopher,turned “everything you ever say will be stamped stupid” labeller, finally sunk in.  This time she did have better things to do than loiter in the ruins.

—————— end ————————

The about 150+ word above story was in response to ‘Monday’s finish the story’ flash fiction challenge. This unique flash fiction challenge  provides  a new photo each week, and the first sentence of a story. The challenge is to finish the story using 100-150 words, not including the sentence provided. Details are available here:

For other interesting takes on the same prompt click the blue frog below:


11 responses to “No loitering allowed here…

  1. Good one!


  2. I’m sure she meant it rhetorically 🙂 Shame he broke into her reminiscing with his clinical explanation. Great story!


  3. Nicely done Ansumani! I like that statement “the good young days.” Thanks for writing again for the MFtS challenge, and be well… ^..^

    Liked by 1 person

  4. That is so sad, “everything you say will be stamped stupid,” because so many women (and men too) feel this way around their spouse. Excellent story ansumani!


  5. Nice finesse. All the more so with such non sequitur 🙂


  6. As Carly Simon put it, “These are the good old days.” I have a lot of great memories, but there is nothing better about those days than now.


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