I may not be a feminist after all….

My special friend sent me the below TED talk link and said, “Since you are a feminist and have a whole section on your blog you may want to see and share  this”.

It was such a timely message from her – because just earlier in the day I was called a sexist by couple of other ‘special friends’. It had me thinking and reflecting (and upset): Am I really a feminist ? Or Am I sexist?

I was forced to examine my beliefs and convictions, thoughts and ideas, and statements and feelings. I still believe that all human beings are equal and should not be discriminated against for gender, race , sexual orientation and economic status. So what made them call me a sexist?

My responses to their question , they said- and the vehemence in which I expressed my opinion, they said. Those  questions and the essence of my responses :

Would you vote for  Carly Fiorina or Hillary Clinton in the 2016 election (assuming ofcourse that they become their respective party candidates)?

I would not vote for Carly because her stance of abortion interferes with the fundamental freedom of a woman to decide on her healthcare choices with her doctor.

(Does this response make a feminist? Or a sexist? )

Do I support killing pain-capable foetus then?

My stance on abortion is this:

-If a foetus is capable of feeling pain then imagine how much more pain the born child would have to endure if it’s unwanted and ends up being uncared for. I would rather a foetus experience the one final pain rather than a lifetime of pains.

-Unless the society/government changes in such a way to ensure that every born child will have all their needs met , including love, 100% of the time , I believe society/government should not interfere in the choice of individuals.

-If a government believes in pro-life I expect the government never to go to war – to dismantle all nuclear weapons and Weapons of mass destruction . And to have  all guns in the country melted to make cradles.

(Does this response make a feminist? Or a sexist? Or socialist? )

Question: who would you vote for: Bernie Sanders or Hillary Clinton – both are pro-choice ?

All things being equal between the two candidates, I would vote for Hillary Clinton because she is a woman.

(Does this statement make me a sexist? It might seem so…but No….because…)

Why?

Because the United states of America – a developed “super-power”- has not had a woman president or even a woman vice president since its founding. The percentage of women in US Congress is low (just touched 20%, see source below). There were more systemic roadblocks in place that prevented women like Hillary Clinton (women from that era) from progressing than today – while the men enjoyed more privilege…..so all things being equal , in 2016, I would vote for a woman president because

1. I want to give her the advantage that she has lacked 
2. she had to work harder to be “equal” to a male who has had systemic advantage. Therefore she is a better candidate.

Am I still a sexist? Did I move towards the feminist midpoint? Do I care what my label is?

If the society changes to allow people of all genders (more than the binary version of genders) equal opportunity  and gender inequality exists only in a museum display as an ancient artefact – with all things being truly truly equal between candidates like Bernie Sanders and Hillary Clinton and when  women represent around 50% of the senate and house, who would I choose? 

I would choose the one who looks good, as I had already written in an earlier post . Bernie Sanders , if you want my vote you better be a good looking dude 🙂 

I don’t know what this response makes me: sexist or feminist or shallow? Do I look like I care?

So who would you vote for between a male and female candidate?  Considering that the two candidates are equal in every respect ..who would you choose: a man or a woman?  And what does that choice make you? A feminist or a sexist?

————–

P.S – Thank you special friend!

source: https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Women_in_the_United_States_House_of_Representatives

Number of Women in Congress by House

Number of women in the United States Congress (1917–2013):^[2]

Congress	Years	in Congress	%	in House	%	in Senate	%
65th	1917–1919	1	0.2%	1	0.2%	0	0%
66th	1919–1921	0	0%	0	0%	0	0%
67th	1921–1923	4	0.7%	3	0.7%	1	1%
68th	1923–1925	1	0.2%	1	0.2%	0	0%
69th	1925–1927	3	0.6%	3	0.7%	0	0%
70th	1927–1929	5	0.9%	5	1.1%	0	0%
71st	1929–1931	9	1.7%	9	2.1%	0	0%
72nd	1931–1933	8	1.5%	7	1.6%	1	1%
73rd	1933–1935	8	1.5%	7	1.6%	1	1%
74th	1935–1937	8	1.5%	6	1.4%	2	2%
75th	1937–1939	9	1.7%	6	1.4%	3	3%
76th	1939–1941	9	1.7%	8	1.8%	1	1%
77th	1941–1943	10	1.9%	9	2.1%	1	1%
78th	1943–1945	9	1.7%	8	1.8%	1	1%
79th	1945–1947	11	2.1%	11	2.5%	0	0%
80th	1947–1949	8	1.5%	7	1.6%	1	1%
81st	1949–1951	10	1.9%	9	2.1%	1	1%
82nd	1951–1953	11	2.1%	10	2.3%	1	1%
83rd	1953–1955	15	2.8%	12	2.8%	3	3%
84th	1955–1957	18	3.4%	17	3.9%	1	1%
85th	1957–1959	16	3.0%	15	3.4%	1	1%
86th	1959–1961	19	3.5%	17	3.9%	2	2%
87th	1961–1963	20	3.7%	18	4.1%	2	2%
88th	1963–1965	14	2.6%	12	2.8%	2	2%
89th	1965–1967	13	2.4%	11	2.5%	2	2%
90th	1967–1969	12	2.2%	11	2.5%	1	1%
91st	1969–1971	11	2.1%	10	2.3%	1	1%
92nd	1971–1973	15	2.8%	13	3.0%	2	2%
93rd	1973–1975	16	3.0%	16	3.7%	0	0%
94th	1975–1977	19	3.6%	19	4.4%	0	0%
95th	1977–1979	20	3.7%	18	4.1%	2	2%
96th	1979–1981	17	3.2%	16	3.7%	1	1%
97th	1981–1983	23	4.3%	21	4.8%	2	2%
98th	1983–1985	24	4.5%	22	5.0%	2	2%
99th	1985–1987	25	4.7%	23	5.3%	2	2%
100th	1987–1989	26	4.9%	24	5.5%	2	2%
101st	1989–1991	31	5.8%	29	6.7%	2	2%
102nd	1991–1993	33	6.2%	30	6.9%	3	3%
103rd	1993–1995	55	10.3%	48	11.0%	7	7%
104th	1995–1997	59	11.0%	50	11.5%	9	9%
105th	1997–1999	66	12.3%	57	13.1%	9	9%
106th	1999–2001	67	12.5%	58	13.3%	9	9%
107th	2001–2003	75	14.0%	62	14.3%	13	13%
108th	2003–2005	77	14.4%	63	14.5%	14	14%
109th	2005–2007	85	15.9%	71	16.3%	14	14%
110th	2007–2009	94	17.6%	78	17.9%	16	16%
111th	2009–2011	96	17.9%	79	18.2%	17	17%
112th	2011–2013	96	17.9%	79	18.2%	17	17%
113th	2013–2015	102	19.1%	82	18.9%	20	20%
114th	2015–2017	104	19.4%	84	19.3%	20	20%